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Sunday, February 10, 2008

A Tale of Two Perspectives Starts With Goodbye

My guess is this:

He sees me as untrusting. Annoying in my anxieties. Always doubting, suspicious, pushing for more from him.

He thinks I am clingy. He thinks I need him too much. He thinks I want him glued to my side.

My side is a different view:

I don't trust him. He betrayed me repeatedly. He lied to me. All of that could be fixed but he does nothing to earn back my trust.

Maybe I do push for more, but I am pushing for more than nothing. I am pushing for my boyfriend who has been in my life for almost 3 years to care about me even a little.

He forgets to call. He forgets my birthday. He blows me off. He never pays me the slightest compliment. He takes me forgranted.

Two different perspectives.

I am picking him up from the airport tonight, and to be honest I expect it to end tonight.

I don't see how this can work. He can't give and I can no longer compromise.

It will be hard.

It will hurt (me anyway).

But it is what it is.

It Starts with Goodbye (Carrie Underwood)

I was sitting on my doorstep,
I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand,
But I knew I had to do it,
And he wouldn't understand,

So hard to see myself without him,
I felt a piece of my heart break,
But when you're standing at a crossroad,
There's a choice you gotta make.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad,
but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

I know there's a blue horizon,
Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me,
Getting there means leaving things behind,
Sometimes life's so bitter sweet.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

Time, time heals,
The wounds that you feel,
Somehow, right now.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye

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